Russian 'mat' - a remarkably expressive, linguistically fascinating, and utterly hilarious system of obscenity that builds a wide variety of words from a handful of extremely vulgar roots - is never taught in the classroom, but is absolutely essential for anyone looking to master Russian in all of its fullness. Russians widely consider 'mat' to be much more obscene than anything in English. Its words were long unprintable, and their use in public performances remains punishable by Russian law. Yet when Russians really want to make their feelings known, many will resort to 'mat' - for it alone has the power to express everything from utter despair, to incandescent rage, to bottomless disdain, to uproarious defiance of a fallen world. This beginner's guide introduces the basics of 'mat' in an in-depth yet manageable fashion, including detailed descriptions of word-building principles, the literal and figurative meanings of 'mat' expressions, and extensive coverage of euphemism -